The security training your people actually read.
Real AI-crime news, told as a four-panel comic your clients' people read in four seconds and forward down the hall. Co-branded with your logo. It reaches the staff your training platform never will — and it comes with a QR key that proves they read it.
Why you can believe any of this
Robot Crimes is the proof. For months, Bit & Byte have run a real Monday–Wednesday–Friday beat — every strip a true AI crime, sourced and dated, read by people who didn't have to. That isn't a promise that funny security content gets finished. It's a receipt that it already does, on schedule. The Blotter is that same engine — co-branded, aimed at your clients' compliance problem. Real news. Fake mercy.
You already pay for awareness training. Almost nobody reads it.
You settled whether awareness matters years ago. This isn't about that. It's the quieter thing: the completion report comes back at 98%, and you know in your gut a finished module and a changed employee are two different animals.
Here's what the record actually says — every number below is public, sourced, and checkable. That's the point.
of breaches involve a human — a click, a talked-into-it, a wrong send. Training barely dents the click rate — but it 4×'s the report rate (21% vs 5%).
AI-related crime complaints in one year — the first year the FBI ever made "AI-related" its own category. ~$893M in reported losses.
Long annual courses get finished ~60% of the time. Short, story-driven content, ~95% — and only the second kind sticks.
Sources: Verizon 2025 Data Breach Investigations Report · FBI 2025 Internet Crime Report · AwareGO microlearning completion data. We only ever repeat the public record.
Fear makes people hide the click. A laugh makes them report it.
Your entire exposure lives in the gap between the click and the phone call. A scared employee sits on a mistake for days and hopes it was nothing. A team that jokes about this flags it in minutes. Humor isn't a softer kind of training — it's shorter dwell time.
A Blotter drop, start to finish.
Somebody sold the office a cure. Forty-five minutes of slides, a gold-seal certificate, ninety-eight percent completion — paperwork gleaming like an alibi rehearsed all night.
Then the phone rang. The voice was the boss. Every syllable, none of it real. A global engineering firm wired twenty-five million to a face never born.
The rub: finishing the course never moved the needle. They completed it. That was the problem.
Two magnums in my desk. One's the training. The other works.
Bit says the bot's a fall guy. Byte says it's the slide. Me? I follow the human.
Satire only. Not legal advice. Built on the 2024 deepfake video-call fraud (public reporting). © 2026 Robot Crimes · A VoiceCore LLC property.
You just got engaged in ninety seconds. So will your clients' people — including the ones who never log in.
Three things a training module can't.
It gets read — and forwarded
Nobody shares a compliance course. People share the strip that made them laugh at the fraud before they were ready to. Distribution built into the content.
It reaches everyone else
The QR key means the janitor, the warehouse crew, the night shift, the part-timers — everyone who never logs into an LMS — scan a poster and they're in. No account, no password.
It makes you visible — with proof
Your logo on the one piece of mail your clients are glad to get. And the QR is tracked — so "did they read it?" comes back as a number, not a shrug.
You do none of the work. It's made once and stamped with your brand for every client — arrives finished, on schedule, ready to forward or hang. You're not writing anything. You're the name on it.
Built for the people who protect a lot of other people.
Managed Service Providers start here
You already bundle awareness training for dozens of clients. One agreement co-brands The Blotter across all of them — the layer that gets read, running alongside the platform you already sell.
Credit Unions & Community Banks
Mandated member fraud education, small teams, members who still open printed mail. Fraud awareness your members — retirees included — actually read.
Awareness Platforms
Fresh, entertainment-led content every month, licensed in. You need it monthly; we produce daily.
Cyber Insurers & Brokers
Risk education your policyholders actually absorb lowers the loss you underwrite.
No "contact us for a quote." Here's the number.
Flat monthly license, tiered by number of client companies (each client counts up to 300 people):
Field Unit
Bureau
Citywide
Enterprise
Month-to-month: cancel anytime, no refund on the current month. Annual prepay (10 months for 12): the discount is the reward for committing to the full year — cancel early and the months you've used re-rate to the standard monthly price, with only the true remainder refunded. No seat-counting. Co-branded with your logo across your whole book — resell it as your own line item and keep the margin.
Don't take our word for it. Watch it work.
There's one thing this rests on that we can't prove on a page — that a team who laughs about this reports the click in minutes instead of days. So we'd rather show you than argue it.
The 30-Day Pilot
- Pick three of your clients (or three departments).
- Thirty days, no charge, fully built — your logo, your colors, your QR key.
- At the end, you ask one question: did your people read it? — and the scan count answers it.
- No is a real answer and costs you nothing. Yes is a new line on every invoice you send.
Twelve minutes on the phone tells you whether it's worth the thirty days.
The answers, before you ask.
Does this replace our current training platform?
No. Keep your platform, your reporting, your phishing simulations, your compliance posture. The Blotter runs alongside — it's the part people actually read.
Does it track completion for compliance?
No — and it isn't the compliance layer. It's the reason people don't sleepwalk through the compliance layer. The QR key does give you real engagement data — scans and reads — which most platforms can't show you.
Who owns the content? Can we co-brand it?
Robot Crimes (VoiceCore LLC) owns the IP; you get a co-branded distribution license for your client base. Your logo on every piece. The work stays ours; the face is yours.
What about legal risk — you're mocking real companies?
No named companies, no real-company mockery. Every fact is sourced to already-public reporting; all opinion is labeled satire; wrongdoers are composited. Reader advisory on every piece.
What are we locked into?
Month-to-month plans cancel anytime (no refund on the current month). The annual prepay (10 months for 12) is a committed year: cancel early and the months you used re-rate to the standard monthly price, with only the remainder refunded. Public pricing, no seat-counting. And the first 30 days are free, so trying it risks nothing.
How does it reach people who don't use a computer?
The QR key. Print a poster for the break room; anyone scans it with a phone and lands on your co-branded drop — no login. That's the janitor, the night shift, the drivers, everyone your LMS can't touch.